Recently, I took my son Jack shopping for a new baseball glove. The old glove was too small for his hand and his coach felt that a new glove might be just the thing that he needed. We both enjoyed looking through all of the gloves. He tried on quite a few (The smell of all that leather was so wonderful!). He finally found a glove that was a perfect fit and away we went. He just happened to have baseball practice next so I was excited for him to try out his new purchase. As we approached the field, I noticed that Jack was beginning to feel both anxious and excited at the same time. He wanted to use his new glove but that feeling of being “comfortable” with the old glove took over. The new glove was a n unknown to Jack, so his performance with the new glove at this point was uncertain in his mind. He knew what he could do with the old glove. This got me thinking about how Smart Women feel the fear and do it anyway.
So many times we hold on to things that no longer “fit” in our lives (a job, a relationship, a baseball glove!) with the thought process that it's comfortable, it's not perfect but it's ok, when in fact, it does not fit who we are anymore. I've learned over time that it's more important to “let go” than to try and “hold on” to what doesn't fit or what doesn't work in our lives. Why? Because until you “let go” and create the space for something new, it's quite possible the “new” in your life won't materialize—there's no place or space for it.
In order for things to change in your life, you have to change. I had a mentor who always told me, “Change does not always mean success, but success always means change.” As a woman and entrepreneur, I've been at the crossroads of change more than once. For example, I gave birth to my second child at age 42, was in the midst of making a complete career change and birthing my Big Idea, Smart Women Smart Solutions. Was it scary? You bet. Was it worth it? Absolutely.
Have you been thinking about doing something new in your life? Do you have a Big Idea that you want to step into but fear of the unknown keeps you stuck right where you are in your comfort zone? If you answered Yes, then guess what? You are not alone. So many women visualize a dream or goal that they want to have happen in their lives. You see something that you want but instead of becoming a reality, it stays in the dream phase of your life. You get comfortable in that old way of being. You tell yourself, “It works, it's reliable.” You begin to think about everything that might go wrong if you go for your goal or dream. Am I right?
Two days ago, we went to Jack's first game since he acquired the new glove. He and I had spent time talking about his feeling comfortable using the new glove (He was still carrying his old glove in his bag). I could tell he was unclear about which choice he would make. I told him that he would know what to do when the time came. As I watched my son walk out to take his position in Right Field that afternoon, I noticed the new glove in his hand and my heart began to beat wildly. He looked over at me in the stands with a sort of question on his face. I gave him a smile and a nod. For a moment, that old fear crept up in me as well. Would he catch a fly ball with this new glove if it came his way? The game began. About halfway through the first inning, a boy hit a fly ball straight out to Right Field. My heart felt like it was coming out of my body. I held my breath. Guess what? Jack caught it! That was the 3rd out. My son came racing off the field, out of the dugout and came running up to me with what I think was the biggest smile he's ever had! “Mom, did you see that!? It works! The glove works!”
Yes, of course I saw it. I knew it would work. Here's what I know for sure: Jack needed to feel the fear and do it anyway. I need to. And you do too.
Anything is possible. Everything is waiting for you.
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Copyright 2009 Joy Chudacoff
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Very nicely done Joy. Your article brought back vivid memories from my own childhood ballfield days and the apprehension of switching to the new glove. What a great analogy to being open to change that you offer here. Your story totally resonated with me.
I will hold onto that visual as I go forward. There’s lots of big changes ahead of me and they’re all going to be good ones, if I remind myself that the glove will work!
Thank you!
I so needed to read this tonight. I recently quit my desk job that I hate and am going after a totally different career…starting my own business! I am going to have to go back to school and wait tables for money. It is very scary but I know that if I don’t use my fear to go for my dream I will always regret it.