I just finished reading the article “Can Facebook Be Your Friend?” in the March 2009 issue of Real Simple magazine. It’s a simple, easy to read article that brings humor and good information about this new idea of Social Networking. I’m using Facebook and I have found it to be useful in two ways. Making real solid business connections and reconnecting with people I have not heard from (or sometimes even remembered!) in over 30 years.
I was sitting in a park recently watching my children play with their grandparents and all at once I heard this deep, booming voice from a distance say, “You must make contact if you want to stay in the game.” I turned to my left and saw a coach working with a girl’s softball team – instructing them on their swing and explaining the importance of making contact between the bat and ball at just the right moment.
This made me think about the idea of contact. For me, contact is about making connections in the relationships I care about – both personally and professionally. If you look up connection in the dictionary, its meaning is “linking things together, the joining of two or more parts or people.” How are you linking people, things, and places together in your life? Are you connecting on a regular basis with yourself, your mind, your body, your relationships, and your creativity?
Given our busy lives as women, we have to be very intentional about making contact with others. Whatever path you choose as a woman – be it career-focused, family-focused, or an integration of the two, making contact and connections is important. Why? Because connecting is vital to our survival in this game called living a meaningful life.
Last week, on two separate occasions, I had the topic of what I refer to as “nutritious” people come up. I was speaking at a women’s convention and I asked them to write down at least 3 “nutritious” people” they have in their life right now. I also had a conversation with a woman in my Success Circle about the difference between “nutritious” people versus those that can drain you and zap your energy level. You know the relationships I’m talking about– right?
Let me give you an example. When you are engaged in a conversation with a “nutritious” person, you feel enlightened, inspired, and energized. Compare this with people who you have relationships with in your life that I refer to as the “downward spiral” relationship. When you are in conversation with these people, it tends to spiral downward in a negative, non-productive way. No matter how many times you try to bring it back to the place of possibility thinking, the conversation tends to stay in the negative. When this happens, you always have 2 choices. One, you can take the high road and stay positive.
Recently, I was having a conversation with a woman when she asked me a crucial question: “What are the steps I need to take in order to live a life filled with passion and purpose?” It’s really a 3 part process. When a woman is ready to create her own extraordinary life, she needs to first decide what she wants. Then she needs to decide how she wants to design her life. Finally, she needs to give herself permission to have the life she has chosen. It’s essential that she believes that she deserves to have the life she chooses. If you decide what you want your life to look like but do not believe that you should really have it, then your “dreams” will never become a reality.
My work is designed to support women in their journey to living their own extraordinary life. Years ago, I knew that I wanted to make some big changes in my own life. I had to first decide what I wanted. Then I had to design my life how I wanted it to be. Lastly, but crucial, I had to give myself permission to create this new way of being. You have to believe it so you can ask for it.
Happy Valentines Day! What a great holiday. Both of my children were excited to go to school today to enjoy festive parties, make valentine crafts and eat lots of sweet treats!
This is a day to honor those who mean so much to us in some special way. I invite you to stop for a moment and think about who makes your heart beat faster, who makes your heart soar with excitement—-did you think of someone, maybe more than one person? Good. It's a great day to tell those people the impact they have on your life.