I just finished reading the article “Can Facebook Be Your Friend?” in the 
March 2009 issue of Real Simple magazine. It’s a simple, easy to read article that brings humor and good information about this new idea of Social Networking. I’m using Facebook and I have found it to be useful in two ways. Making real solid business connections and reconnecting with people I have not heard from (or sometimes even remembered!) in over 30 years.
Smart Women Create the Right Web
Earlier this week, I was taking an early morning walk with a good friend and smart woman and we ran into a few spider webs (literally!). It’s the time of year when spiders are spinning and carefully crafting their webs together in a way that will serve and protect them. This got me thinking about how Smart Women always create a strong and sturdy web in their lives both at work and at home.
If you look up the word “web” in the dictionary, one of the definitions is “anything put together in a careful way.” It’s essential that women take the time to put their lives together in a careful and thoughtful way. Why? There are so many options and opportunities for women in the world today. You have so many choices on how you choose to live your life. What’s most important is to make those choices authentically.
And then from that place of authenticity, spin your life together, design and build it with energy and passion. Let it be a life that soars with meaning to you, the designer. If you choose not to do this, then your life just “happens.” It can begin to unfold in unpredictable ways with no meaning or direction. Putting your authentic life together involves having people who are supportive and loving, an environment that provides relaxation, and a place for inspired creativity.
In your business life, when you have a Big Idea, dream or goal, it’s essential that you build a web that is super strong in its marketing message as well as making sure that you have solutions on how to manage your time well so that you get the right things done during your day. When my friend ran into the spider web, it was a challenge to pull all of the sticky threads off her hat and sweatshirt.
A well-designed spider web is very sticky. Have you created a product or service that carries a message that will “stick” with your target market? When your target market needs your product or service, do they immediately think of you or someone else? A spider knows that in order to build a strong web, she needs the support of strong tree branches to protect her from the wind and other elements. This is true for you as well. Having a strong support system in your life (both personally and professionally) is key to making it happen—to help you go to the next level.
How Smart Women Stay Connected
I was sitting in a park recently watching my children play with their grandparents and all at once I heard this deep, booming voice from a distance say, “You must make contact if you want to stay in the game.” I turned to my left and saw a coach working with a girl’s softball team – instructing them on their swing and explaining the importance of making contact between the bat and ball at just the right moment.
This made me think about the idea of contact. For me, contact is about making connections in the relationships I care about – both personally and professionally. If you look up connection in the dictionary, its meaning is “linking things together, the joining of two or more parts or people.” How are you linking people, things, and places together in your life? Are you connecting on a regular basis with yourself, your mind, your body, your relationships, and your creativity?
Given our busy lives as women, we have to be very intentional about making contact with others. Whatever path you choose as a woman – be it career-focused, family-focused, or an integration of the two, making contact and connections is important. Why? Because connecting is vital to our survival in this game called living a meaningful life.
Smart Women Are Nutritious
Last week, on two separate occasions, I had the topic of what I refer to as “nutritious” people come up. I was speaking at a women’s convention and I asked them to write down at least 3 “nutritious” people” they have in their life right now. I also had a conversation with a woman in my Success Circle about the difference between “nutritious” people versus those that can drain you and zap your energy level. You know the relationships I’m talking about– right?
Let me give you an example. When you are engaged in a conversation with a “nutritious” person, you feel enlightened, inspired, and energized. Compare this with people who you have relationships with in your life that I refer to as the “downward spiral” relationship. When you are in conversation with these people, it tends to spiral downward in a negative, non-productive way. No matter how many times you try to bring it back to the place of possibility thinking, the conversation tends to stay in the negative. When this happens, you always have 2 choices. One, you can take the high road and stay positive.
Smart Women Give Themselves Permission
Recently, I was having a conversation with a woman when she asked me a crucial question: “What are the steps I need to take in order to live a life filled with passion and purpose?” It’s really a 3 part process. When a woman is ready to create her own extraordinary life, she needs to first decide what she wants. Then she needs to decide how she wants to design her life. Finally, she needs to give herself permission to have the life she has chosen. It’s essential that she believes that she deserves to have the life she chooses. If you decide what you want your life to look like but do not believe that you should really have it, then your “dreams” will never become a reality.
My work is designed to support women in their journey to living their own extraordinary life. Years ago, I knew that I wanted to make some big changes in my own life. I had to first decide what I wanted. Then I had to design my life how I wanted it to be. Lastly, but crucial, I had to give myself permission to create this new way of being. You have to believe it so you can ask for it.
Smart Women Know When to Let Go
Every day as I leave my house, I am drawn to a large tree across the street, with beautiful branches and leaves. For awhile now, it has been shedding its leaves. Yesterday I noticed for the first time that all of the leaves have fallen off, leaving the tree bare. Nature has a way of making room for new growth.
Our family is preparing for a big transition this week. We are moving from a house that we have lived in for 10 years. It’s the home where my husband Greg and I began our life together in marriage. It’s the only home our children, Jack and Jenna have ever known, so it holds a lot of memories that are valuable to us. It also holds a lot of other things! Things we have accumulated over the years that are not part of where we are going. We have a lot of possessions that are no longer a “fit” for us. I am finding it hard to let go. It can be challenging knowing what to keep and what to let go of. I’m not alone in this dilemma it seems. I read recently that the storage unit business is soaring as people accumulate more than they have space for and they cannot bring themselves to let go.
What a great holiday!
Happy Valentines Day! What a great holiday. Both of my children were excited to go to school today to enjoy festive parties, make valentine crafts and eat lots of sweet treats!
This is a day to honor those who mean so much to us in some special way. I invite you to stop for a moment and think about who makes your heart beat faster, who makes your heart soar with excitement—-did you think of someone, maybe more than one person? Good. It's a great day to tell those people the impact they have on your life.
Be well,
Joy
